The Adventures of
Rubber-Man

The Further Adventures of Rubber-Man and Zehr’s-Woman

(Summer- Fall 2001)

One pleasant evening early in June Rubber-Man and Zehr's-Woman were enjoying some time off together and watching the weeds grow in the garden. Due to the beginning of "Summer Re-runs" on TV the best thing to watch was a trio of rabbits frisking about in the grass by the silver dogwood. They obviously had more than frisking about in the summer evening in mind however, because a few days later Elizabeth noticed a hole dug into the side of one of our mulch piles and lined with fur. A few days later there were baby bunnies in it. We told the girls and all trooped out to quietly admire them squirming about from a safe distance.  Silly rabbits. Obviously new parents, making a nest in such an exposed location. That Saturday morning at the Town-House of Solitude Zehr's-Woman and Rubber-Man were enjoying a cup of tea when they heard the cawing of crows and looked out to see a crow carrying off a furry bundle from the nest! Abandoning his tea, Rubber-Man issued forth in his boxer shorts of speed prepared to hurl rocks and abuse at the devious corvids. Alas! to no avail..... the nest was a shambles and the entire side of the mulch pile was collapsed. I dug about for survivors and found one little bunny who had escaped the raid. Once he recovered his wits he bolted into the grass.

 This caused a crisis of conscience for Rubber-Man. I didn't want to muck about with nature, but there were some pretty big crows hanging about on the power lines. So I posted the Wiener-Heads on guard while Zehr's-Woman and I did some research. Our research told us that the doe wasn't due back until the evening, and that was a long time for the kitten to hide in the grass and become a tasty snack! What to do? What to do? What to do? Finally we decided to move the kitten into the shrubs at the back of the yard, where the rabbits usually come and go, hoping that when the doe returned she and junior would bump into each other. So that's what we did, although the bunny did not appreciate being picked up by something even bigger than a crow, and he was hugging dirt so well I had trouble getting my fingers under him. He fit quite nicely into the palm of one hand.

 That evening and the next we noticed a rabbit nosing about the mulch pile and thought "Damn, she hasn't found the kitten." But a couple of days later we noticed her in the yard being followed about by a much smaller shape in the grass. They were so far away I could barely see them, but Zehr's-Woman with her keen-eyed Mom-o-vision spotted them with ease. It could've been a different pair of rabbits. It could've been a rabbit being harassed by an aggressive shrew. I prefer to contemplate a happy ending however.

    With July came the end of school and my eagerly awaited two weeks holiday!! We finally decided to part with Old Blue, my trusty rusted Chev. It wasn't going to pass an emission test so a scrap dealer hauled it away and gave me $30. We then went car shopping on Elizabeth's days off. Started at KIA, but were leery about the quality. Tried a Ford Focus but didn't like the sales guy. Then we spotted a one-year old Toyota Echo and loved it. The trunk is surprisingly large (although I know I'm going to have reason to miss Old Blue's spacious trunk, especially at Christmas) and I like the ergonomics of the car. Sometimes I feel like I'm driving a toy, but that just adds to the fun. It's great on gas, which is a Good Thing. I did the hour and a half drive to Grandma's in Oakville, drove home, drove around all week and then back to Oakville on one tank of gas! We used the Corolla for a Trade-In so we're down to a one car family now. So between the marginally reduced insurance premium and stretching the payments out over 6 years, we can sort of afford it.

 Buying the car was the big thing on our holidays, but we did spend one afternoon going to Silver City in Kitchener and seeing Shrek with the kids. I enjoyed it more than Elizabeth. After we came out of the theater, Colleen asked if we could go across the parking lot to the Chapters (for you Americans it's a big-box book retailer) "just for a look". Is she my kid or what? So $120.00 later we finally emerged with a few books....

With August the Wiener-heads got to go to Grandma's in Oakville to attend a week-long science day-camp. They learned chemistry and made various edible (ersatz cola or ice-cream) or nasty substances (disgusting slime balls) depending on the day. Fun was had.

 Zehr's-Woman had to work all that week though but we did go out for dinner and then back home for a video on the Friday. Dinner was a bit disappointing, but dessert made up for it so we'll give the restaurant another try.

My back of course has been continuing to bother me. One night I stayed for some overtime (a rare thing nowadays...) to check some crates sent back from the warehouse for a quality issue (because "Quality is Job 1" unless the counts are down, then Quantity rules!). Bending over big crates and lifting bundles of rubber isn't normally a Smart Thing and my neck said "Ow! Stop that!" So the company nurse sent me to see a physiotherapist and the company would pay for it.

We actually got some rain by the end of August which meant that Zehr's-Woman and I could do some gardening on the Labour Day weekend. We dug out and planted one of the flower beds she had marked out last year, which we had parked one of our mulch piles on top of. The mulch pile of bunny-doom to be specific, but I was relieved not to find any nasty remains when shovelling. Actually the plastic and mulch did a good job of killing the grass making our job easier. Only one pile and one flower bed to go (until she marks out other flower beds).

But Zehr's-Woman spent most of Saturday in bed restoring her super powers so she could go wrestle with the Evil Sunday Shoppers. Fortunately it only takes about 15-20 minutes to walk to church, but we haven't been to church together as a family in a while. All these people who are so glad THEY don't have to work on Sundays. All these people who espouse "Family Values" and vote for Neo-Conservative Capitalist Politicians. And they're all out spending money on Sunday forcing other people to work. The story is it's supposed to be high-school kids and students working on the weekends. Well it AIN'T.  Sunday is the store's BUSIEST DAY!!

Fortunately Zehr's-Woman is as wise and prudent as she is cute and she has been paying down our credit cards, so we're in an OK position financially (well as OK as one can be when getting an $1100.00 kick in the wallet). I have a couple of books to finish writing over the next two weeks (one of which I still have to sell). I also have flower beds to dig, compost piles to turn and door trim to paint if it would ever stop raining. Since it's wet today I went down to the Unemployment Office and then started cleaning the oven. The Naked Chef's roast chicken is good, but it makes an unholy mess of your oven and sets off the smoke alarm if you aren't careful. So I think it's been two hours since I sprayed the oven cleaner, time to get the gloves on. (No, I'm not coming over to clean your ovens, either, so just forget about it!)

 I'm kicking myself I didn't get my b. Ed. but if the plant can hang on until another academic term I could be eligible for assistance with the tuition for retraining. (I can get retraining money if I lose my job due to plant closure or restructuring, but anything else I have to find what I can). That'd be good. Being a teacher sucks in Ontario with our asinine government, but it's better than another factory job. Although I've forgotten an AWFUL lot in the 15 years since I graduated.

Proud
Canadian

 The Tirolese Site • Portraits • Design • Magician • Family • Ana • Alexander • Rubber-Man • Dirty Bird